In coming up with a style idea for my "singer persona", i drew a few fashion sketches. This started back in May after i went to Princeton with Far Out and performed. One of the sketches was the idea of a dress i call the "Tutu Dress".
The image in my dress was AWESOME. I imagined me and girls of similar taste in fashion rocking it so hard. I even considered taking it to small local boutiques in Atlanta when i built up enough inventory. Everywhere i went i looked at women and imagining how their different body types looked in my dress. Can u imagine chicks rocking this?! OMG! I was so excited.
But time and other activities put me behind my fashion goal. I was still anxious about making my dress but it wasnt a high priority. And now, almost three months later while looking for more inspiration for style i find this:
Damn Betsey Johnson! I appreciate and dislike you right now... i'm jealous and annoyed. I appreciate her design because, well, great minds think alike. lol. I'm jealous because that's still my freakin design! My designs are shorter, maybe stopping a little before the 2nd layer. And not as wide and thick. But i'm annoyed because i should have taken more initiative.
As with everything else in life, there's a lesson to be learned here. But this lesson in particular is one i often struggle with. And it's annoying because i'm always trying to improve myself but this fault keeps sneaking up on me! UGH! I need to "Just Do It" and jump into everything i do. My need to be analytical and organized holds me back. And i dont move until i know exactly what i'ma do. I need to just go to the store grab a bunch of tulle and figure it out as i go along. Granted, this is not always the best solution... but as of now, i'd rather have tulle and be closer to making my dress. Than it being 3 months later, i'm dress-less and just found a designer with the same design.
I made that statement (Just Do It/Get Over It) my theme for 2009. And i've done well so far but there's more i need to learn. And, for the record, I'm not upset about this design thing... I take it as it is. I cant control things outside of my circle and i accept that. But i can control who i become and how i initiate my tasks. I just have to remember to just do it and jump in.
Love & Life,
Allie
Style.com
And after all of this and a conversation with my mom, I realized I was driven by fear. It’s funny, because I never thought of myself as such. You imagine someone living in fear being dramatically fearful, when in realization, their just moderately fearful… if that makes sense. My excuse to everything was “I’m being cautious.” I was cautious about money, love, family, everything… including my dreams & goals. You’re supposed to go after what u want, right? Just grab it. So what it may be covered in nails and you may have to jump over a huge ditch before you reach it, you gotta do it. Lol. Okay, that’s a little dramatic. But nothings easy and the fear of getting stabbed or falling down shouldn’t hold you from your dreams.
